Vulnerability at its finest…
Testing one two three, is this thing on?
I feel like I'm standing on stage about to give a speech to a room full of people, and did I mention I'm not a fan of public speaking?
Welcome joey, to the first of many Tuesdays with Joey.
At a very young age I made myself invisible, living on an island, population one. I took on the responsibility of keeping myself safe. I operated as if everything and everyone was a threat.
don't ask for something, they might say no
don't ask for help, you'll look weak
don't say no, they might get mad
don't make eye contact, they might think you're interested
don't have an opinion, it might be the wrong one
don't be a burden
While I was trying to keep everyone else comfortable, I was subconsciously miserable. I was in survival mode. But as long as I kept pushing through, making money, keeping people happy, everything would be fine, right? Wrong! Living to survive doesn't feel like living to me.
When the stress of that lifestyle began to manifest as health problems, I had to slow down and figure out what's going on. It forced me to make major changes and summon some major courage. I've been learning to put myself first, voice my needs and wants, take up space, share my opinion and say no. And now, down the road on this journey, you couldn't pay me all the money in the world to go back to that previous version of myself.
This is what I want for others, who want to live a life with intention and joy, who are ready to push through the fears that are keeping them stuck. I'm proof that it's possible and totally worth it.
I've started this newsletter to share the steps that I've adopted and discoveries I've made that have assisted me in opening the invitation to living my fullest life!
Today, I invite you to explore one of your fears:
Bring to mind a situation where fear is keeping you stuck.
Write down ALL the worst possible things that you fear could happen in this situation. When you've got them all written down, ask yourself “and then what…” When we allow ourselves to explore the worst case scenarios and the feelings that go along with them, we are more prepared to prevent/anticipate them.
It also helps to acknowledge that the likelihood of ALL of those things happening is next to none. Before I do this exercise, it feels like there are 100 things I'm worried about, once I'm finished it's usually only about 6.
My current fear:
After reading this you unsubscribe, along with everyone else.
I have zero subscribers.
I feel like a failure.
I have to start all over.
The truth of the matter is, I know everyone won't unsubscribe, I'm pretty sure my parents won't. If and when people do, I'll remind myself that I am not for everyone and that's ok. As Glennon Doyle says, she's happy when people get off her bus, it just makes more room for the people that want to be there.
To stay up to date, subscribe to my newsletter.
Thanks for reading! I look forward to seeing you next time.
With so much gratitude,